The close, warm air of Granmaw Selkirk’s spare bedroom reminded RJ of having a fever. Of childhood diseases and of the long dry years back into the dark around him. He couldn’t see a thing that had changed in this room since he’d spent a week in here down with both the measels and chicken pox. The walls held World War memorabilia on it (WWI,WWII? He couldn’t tell.) Some faded fabric samples and a shelf of old dolls in crochet’d dresses with yellowed china doll complexions. The railings on the bed were worn down to the brass and the bedding felt cool or possibly damp.RJ smiled wryly as he slid into bed, they always had felt like that, like camping in a cave. Aunt Chrissy saw to it that the sheets were tucked in tightly on every corner. A real problem for RJ since he’d grown too tall for that bed years ago. He felt certain that the pillows and comforter in the ‘wedding ring’ quilt pattern were the same as the last time he slept here. The pillows smelled of musty feathers. RJ seemed to recall that his granmaw once kept chickens at her place, maybe this was what had happened to them? Directly overhead were two low watt light bulbs mounted in-between twin sets of deer antlers. He registered them with a start remembering the fear those hollow sockets invoked in him as a child. In all the years since he’d never seen anyone keep that much of an animal’s skull for decoration. Usually it was just the antlers by themselves, or maybe the full head, but this was all of the skull except the lower jaw. As if the deer skull was biting thru the wooden plank they were mounted on. RJ began to doubt he could sleep at all with his mind running back and forth to all the memories this house brought him. He wondered if they were all bad memories and try as he might, he was hard pressed to remember any good ones. His mother only seemed to come here in hard times. When trouble was closing in she would head for the little house on the hill with the tar-paper walls and corrugated tin for a roof. It was her sanctuary. RJ guessed that if he’d lived in any one place as long as his mom had lived here he’d feel the the same about it. He grimaced to himself with the realization that he had no such sanctuary, had never had. He pulled the chain dangling down past the deer’s gaping eye sockets and the dark rushed in around him. As an adult he felt uncomfortable to be cared for by his elderly family but deep inside he knew this was a close as he would get to his mother from now on.

Rj wasn’t sure when he fell asleep. He drifted off listening to the distant soft sound of Aunt Chrissy’s old Philco radio bringing in some station that carried news of her “Sisters of the Eastern Star” and their projects with the poor children around the world. RJ was amazed to hear it still worked, anything with a wooden case and tubes had no right to still work in 1999. Maybe the house preserved things as well as it had his grandmother? Its tinny voice faded in and out and at some point was replaced by the sound of his granmaw talking to someone outside. He lay still and listened, almost asleep but wondering who would have come by at that hour for surely it must be long after midnight by now?

“Well come on up if you’re coming. ” Granmaw Selkirk was saying, “I don’t think you mean any harm or you wouldn’t stand there waiting to be invited.”

Hello Granmaw…do you remember me?”

“I know you went to rest next to your daddy way too early son, is what.”

The visitor walked up the porch steps, each one creaking and releasing slowly as if the stranger had problems moving without aid, without pausing to rest his full weight on each step as he went.

“Sparky remembers you, even though he’s no longer a pup.”

“None of us are…well…none of you are…” RJ could hear the collie’s tail thumping rapidly against the wooden floor of the porch. He was distracted by trying to remember when they’d given Granmaw that puppy…14…15 years? The stranger’s dry breathing filled the pauses as he spoke and RJ wondered if this was an elderly friend of the family, ruined by black lung like his grandfather had been.

“Little brother is here…but he doesn’t know why yet does he?”

“No young’un, I have been fixin’ to tell him and we’ve all been wishing mightily we wouldn’t have to, that you were still here to take up Gerry’s work.”

“I know granmaw,…that’s why I came. Besides, its been so hot lately…the ground’s all cracked up…a feller can’t hardly get any rest. What with the funeral not a stone’s throw away…”:

“Did Gerry ask you to come see me young-un?”

“She sure wishes she could…come herself Granmaw…but you know there’s a time of wandering…before you find your way…now isn’t there?”

“That’s what the songs say boy, I reckon I’ll find out for myself afore too long.”

RJ dared not breathe, he listened intently, trying to picture the scene out on the porch. There was the creak of a chair taking weight, then he heard Sparky whine and his nails clicked down the steps as he left for his place under the porch.

“Why you’re soakin’ wet and smell of the river. Were you in such a hurry to see your Granny that you couldn’t cross Twelve-pole at the bridge?”

“I reckon I was Granmaw…and I have to get back right soon…I just wanted you to know…how sorry I am that I can’t do this for you…for the family. Plus Gerry…mom wanted me to tell you…not to fret none…that she’s in a good place now…among friends.”

“Oh your Granmaw knows that Randall Lee, and she knows its not gonna be easy to find a replacement for her. You four boys were to sort it out between yourselves once you were old enough. Its just a pity you got bit by that tick and died …”

There was a long silence. RJ shivered despite the heavy comforter clutched to his chest. His mind rebelled with the thought of what was on his Granmaw’s porch. But it couldn’t be, someone was playing a trick on her, a cruel vicious trick. Granmaw Selkirk was blind he reminded himself, but sharp as she was, she would still have a soft spot for anyone pretending to have news of her recently departed daughter. RJ’s heart ached as it dawned on him that Granmaw HAD lost a daughter, a loss just as intimate and painful as losing a mother. That thought pushed thru the dread he was feeling and cinched the deal in his head. He slid back the covers and turned slowly, trying not to let the bedsprings creak as he shifted one leg over the side.

“Ronnie’d be a good choice…Kelly Ray’s strong enough…but too stubborn to listen…when he needs to…How are you going to convince RJ…to stay here and not go back…to Indiana?”

Granmaw hummed or chanted to herself for a bit “mmmn mmmn mmmn…. Quite a few people are studying on that very question.” She sounded like she was drifting to sleep then said more clearly. “He can be loyal to a lost cause at all the wrong times and he takes so long to make up his mind on the little things, not one to take chances…I’m am of two minds on whether them that live below would prefer him or not.” Then she paused and hummed some more, the only other sound the creaking of two rocking chairs moving in tandem. “They are so anxious to have things sorted before Halloween.”

RJ had one foot on the floor, he braced on the bed knob to stand and it creaked loudly. He froze, listening to and not liking what was being said about him. The voices went on though he thought he heard the rocking chairs stop as someone stood up.

“Ronnie’s got that bad back, and there’s a lot of hauling and crawling to do, plus he’s had military training and you know how that broke your father’s mind.”

RJ set his other foot on the floor and looked toward the beaded curtain. It would be impossible to sneak thru it without everyone in the house hearing it, so he determined to push thru quickly. Half a dozen steps would take him to the screen door and then another two and he would be on the porch between the porch steps and whoever it was pretending to be his dead brother.

“It will be…the death of him.”

Granmaw Selkirk sucked in her breath “Say what you mean clearly young’un, the training or his back?”

“I….”

RJ stepped to the beaded curtain and it opened before him as he reached out making him startle. His aunt Chrissy was standing there in her heavy cotton nightgown. She held her fingers up to his lips and whispered urgently “Not now RJ, please Jesus don’t go out now!” RJ tried to look around her to the screen door. He could see the outline of someone standing there, looking back at him, but he could not make out who they were. The figure seemed to shrink a bit as he watched to barely the height of a child. A dry, dark hand touched the screen, then another as they cupped a face pressed up against the wire, outlined but indistinct. “He’s still fat as ever…fatter!”

“WHO are you?” RJ called over his aunt’s shoulder. She was pressing hard against his chest and praying loudly trying to muffle out the sound of everything else. RJ wanted to push her aside and confront the stranger on the porch but she cried and wailed against his chest, gripping his shirt so tightly that she pulled chest hairs in her grip. He looked down at her and pried her fingers from him, not able to get past her in the narrow doorway. The screen door creaked as it opened and then banged as it was let go.

“Too soon!” Aunt Chrissy was shouting between gospel lyrics “We will all meet up yonder over there! But its too Soon RJ, Lord Jesus please!”

The figure at the door walked down the steps into the yard, and RJ forcibly sat his aunt down in the Visitor’s seat. He burst out onto the porch and peered into the dark. His eyes wouldn’t adjust fast enough and he stumbled down the steps, slipping and falling hard on the last one. He scrabbled at the railing and took a couple steps into the dark yard. He thought he heard rapid footsteps on the road just beyond and childish laughter.

“Never could catch me little brother!” Granmaw Selkirk stood, felt her way to the door and hugged Aunt Chrissy to calm her.

“Its alright Chrissy, its alright. Those two said their goodbyes years ago. They aren’t going to set things to happening by crossing paths now. No ill will come of it, so just calm down.” RJ stood in the dark wishing he had a flashlight to shine down the road, maybe catch a glimpse of who had just left. He thought that he knew, really knew, and the thought chilled him to the bone. No way he thought to himself. NO F–ing Way. He went to his car and hit the headlights, they shined out across the sidewalk and over the tops of the plants in the un-tended garden. They weren’t pointing in the right direction to help, but he felt calmer by breaking darkness’ grip around him. He noticed that not even the insects were making noises now, and no wind moved the leaves of the crab apple tree directly in front of the car.

He shivered and looked around, every dark corner of the yard suddenly suspect. He could see the hillside’s black outline behind his Granmaw’s house and the squares of light shining out from the kitchen and bedroom stood out like holes cut in the night, letting the light of the next day shine thru. RJ’s fear was settling deep in his chest, in his stomach and he was wondering how to leave the lights of his car on so he could walk that path of light back to the house, and then turn them off without going back out there into the dark. Maybe he should sleep in the car for the rest of the night? Maybe he should drive away as fast as he could and not stop till dawn? No, driving would mean going down the road the same direction the stranger went and the thought of who might be walking along that road now, maybe putting out a thumb for a lift was the most frightening thing RJ had ever considered in his waking life.

His Granmaw’s voice broke the freezing grip of his fear. “Come back inside RJ, Chrissy’s put water on to boil for coffee. I see right now that no one’s going to get any sleep till we have a little talk. ” RJ turned off his car and quickly walked up the sidewalk to the steps. He slipped in a puddle of water he hadn’t seen on the way down and wiped his feet on the rug outside the screen door. It was wet too. Granmaw Selkirk felt out for him and gave his hand a squeeze. The cold pit of fear inside him melting as he was led into the kitchen. Aunt Chrissy wouldn’t catch his eye and busied herself with the coffee. Grandma Selkirk sat down in a precisely positioned chair and said “Looks to me like you’re gonna get your story about Indians after all.”